By way of addendum to Meredith's last post, "The Worrier" and to give a slightly different perspective...
1. Moms, in general, worry more. They just do, and especially at this time of life, becasue as she said, she's home all the time with Elise while I'm at work. All she has to do is obsess. I think this is perfectly normal and in fact the way it should be. Nature makes us overly cautious and worried so that we don't miss anything. Since we have no clue what we're doing - we worry, we read, which always makes it worse, then we wait. Ususally what we're worrying about subsides and we feel better. Except that we're worrying about the next thing.
2. Worrying is fine as well except when I invariably buy into Meredith's neurosis. Let's say she's worried about something... She'll try to convince me and I'll talk her through it, or rationize why it's nothing to worry about. Then I'll sit and think... or have Ellie alone and think, 'maybe meredith's right and what if...' then it's all over. I've bought in and our child is brain damaged or in some way irrevicably altered in some horrible fashion.
3. The POWER >>> It's the antidote to worrying. Ellie was fussing in her cradle and every time we put hr down she fussed more. Finally, instead of picking her up, calming her and putting her down, Meredith just gently placed her hand on Ellie and she immediately quieted. No, not just quieted, she became serene. It can only be described as the power. Meredith, despite all her worrying, has the power to make everything okay. Mother Nature saw fit to grant this to dads only in time of extreme rarity, for she knew we would abuse our power, but mothers have it in abundance. I think I remeber this power as a child myself in the form of a kiss on the boo-boo. My mom would kiss the boo-boo and all the pain would go away.
If only all the new mothers of the world could get together and use this astonishing power collectively to heal the world.
So for all the worring... for all the apprehension and fears, there is THE POWER.
1 comment:
wow. you guys don't know how important your blog is to us. it's so inspiring. you guys are like the Dr.Phil of couples : ) I am the queen of worriers!!! It got worse when Seth got into his line of work. I can't even imagine how it will be when our little "wasian" (what my family calls it) arrives. When I read the blogs I feel somewhat validated for what I am feeling, and not just crazy. the little things you have done has made a big impact on others, so thank you for sharing!
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