Week 14 - Back to Work

This was by far the most difficult week of parenthood for us so far. This week I went back to work and we therefore had to entrust the life and wellbeing of our precious child to, essential strangers. After spending the last 13 weeks with Ellie, pretty much 24/7, leaving her was excrutiating. The longest I have ever been away from her prior to this week was 4 hours. And every time either of us has gone somewhere without her in the past, we have left in the loving care of her grandparents or each other. So even though Marty has been going to work and leaving Ellie for months now, this was his first week having to part with her when she was with someone other than family.

Luckily, Ellie's Oma and Opa watched her on my first day back (Tuesday) so I only had to worry about separation anxiety that first day. Work was hard, especially since everyone kept asking about her and wanting to see pictures. It's hard to ignore the fact that you are missing your child when you're being forced to talk about her and look at her picture all day! It wasn't until Wednesday, her first day at daycare, that I had to worry about my separation anxiety and her well-being.

Fortunately for me, Marty was the one to drop her off at daycare, so he got to refresh his separation anxiety, which he had gotten used to over the past few months. It was quite an adventure for daddy and daughter, as they took the bus to daycare (marking Ellie's first trip on public transportation! Is she a city-girl or what?!) When they got there, Daddy was stressed out and nervous and Ellie was all smiles and coos and apparently didn't seem to care if she was being held by a large, strange woman or her parents. A good thing for Ellie, but a hard thing for dad! I spent most of the day at work watching the clock, trying to calculate how early would be too early to call to check up on her. I don't want to be one of those crazy obsessive parents that calls every twenty minutes, but it took all the strength I had not to do it! I somehow held out until 11am and I got a resunding "Elise is doing great!"

I left work about an hour early on day one and arrived at the daycare to find Elise sound asleep and completely content. That was until I woke her up trying to get her in the car seat and she started crying. The report from her first day was good. She had no problems taking the bottle or taking a nap. She even did some lovely artwork! I was beginning to think that she could really care less about the whole being left with strangers thing. She showed her true colors when we got home though, as she spent most of the evening trying to nurse and would scream bloody murder if I even thought about putting her down for two seconds.

Day two went similarly well. Daddy and Ellie had a fun bus trip, Daddy was all nerves and Ellie was all smiles, and I left work an hour early to pick up a baby that was perfectly content. Again, from the second we got home, she didn't want to do anything but nurse and cuddle.

Day three, Friday, did not go as smoothly. Our transportation plan was complicated by heavy rain and a public transportation problem that resulted in Marty holding a diaper bag, a backpack, a baby in a carseat and an umbrella for 40 minutes waiting for the bus. She eventually fell asleep, but woke abruptly when the door to the daycare slammed behind them and she was much less of a happy camper for her dropoff. Then when I picked her up and took her home, she not only wanted to nurse constantly, but also apparently wanted to keep us in her sights to make sure we wouldn't leave her because she refused to go to down for the night for the first time in weeks. We ended up having to rock and soothe her for hours, like in the "old days" and she eventually drifted off.

The best thing about going back to work is the weekend! Being apart from my baby makes the time that we do have together that much more exciting and meaningful. I no longer take the time I have with her for granted and have spent the entire weekend doing "nothing" with Ellie and loving every minute of it.